“Customer texts and call recordings were also stolen, but deemed useless because every Trump Mobile customer is stupid as fuck”

(Probably)

Love me some Uncle John’s. I’d recognize that page number decorator anywhere!

A person’s life and liberty and pursuit of happiness aren’t shared resources existing in finite amounts. Water is. I’m not making a statement about what policy should be implemented, just what words should be used. Rights are ephemeral and unalienable, and water is very much neither of those.

If water was a right, anyone could have as much of it as they want to use for pretty much any reason.

A skeleton walks into a bar and says “gimme a beer and a mop!”

Weird that cancer and wolf are grouped together