“Hi, it’s me your favorite employee Greg. Ever wonder where I go during my second poop break and why the kitchen smells like fish!? Subscribe to Greg Plus to find out! 14,99 per month or save up 30 dollars when you subscribe for the year at 149,99. Use the code #fuckcapitalism to get an additional 10 percent off!”
You rent each number on your ssn individually, if you miss a payment then you lose a random number. When you only have 1 number left you get sent to an island where you have to kill 8 people. For every person killed you get their respective number, if you manage to kill 8 then your new ssn is composed out of their numbers.
If your new ssn is a duplicate of an existing number then a duel is arranged between you and the existing holder of said number unless either party pays the ssn company 9 million dollars for a new number.
I saw a functional one for sale past customs in the Duty free shop in Singapore. Make of that what you will